Last week I opened a very nice card, from the guy who sold me a car two years ago. Now that's kinda depressing. So here's a brief tour of some of our favorite holiday greeting cards over the years. We have definitely made an impression in Xmas card land!
First Christmas together — 1996. This wasn't actually a card, but certainly brings back memories...I hadn't known that I'd married a man who loved Christmas so much. I had always been a sort of down-on-one's-luck bah humbug type. Not any more!
In the beginning...
Green Acres Christmas — 1998. This was a specific vision, city folk turned eccentric country gentry. We raised goats for about three years, tender little buggers that we just loved to bits.
Whose beard do you think is cuter, Toby's or the nanny goat's?
Cappuccino, Curious and BeBop
Aloha Xmas — 2001. A walk in the Botanical Gardens in Hilo, Hawaii, that summer. Next year's Christmas destination!
"All we need is this leaf, to shelter us from the rain."
photo by Margaret Goeden
2003 — Big Sur Gothic or X-rated Christmas. The day after our wedding anniversary, a wonderful photographer paid a call. He was so happy to find willing nudists to pose in Big Sur's springtime glory! Note the pitchfork and our very embarrassed looking dog.
I couldn't quite post the uncensored version (my mother looks at this blog)
photo by Dick Sonnen
Gender-bender Christmas, 2005. This one needs no explanation. Our true characters come out. Perhaps this makes a better New Year's card, my favorite holiday.
photo by Sylvia Steininger, www.sylviasphotography.com
I had to add our sexy former neighbor Lisa to the mix. We miss you Lisa!
And this time around —Rubber Duckie Christmas?
With much love and warmth from our home to yours.
Linda and Toby Rowland-Jones
Just in case you want to excuse yourself from sending Xmas cards to family and friends you can tell them the story below. It's sufficiently gross to get you off the hook, at least until they check out urban cockroach myth.
NEVER LICK ENVELOPES A woman was working in a post office in California ..One day she licked the envelopes and postage stamps instead of using a sponge. That very day the lady found a cut on her tongue. A week later, she noticed an abnormal swelling of her tongue. She went to the doctor, and they found nothing wrong. Her tongue was not sore or anything. A couple of days later, her tongue started to swell more, and it began to get really sore, so sore, that she could not eat. She went back to the hospital, and demanded something be done. The doctor took an x-ray of her tongue and noticed a lump. He prepared her for minor surgery. When the doctor cut her tongue open, a live cockroach crawled out!!!! (EEEEEEWWWWWWW.) There were cockroach eggs on the seal of the envelope. The egg was able to hatch inside of her tongue, because of her saliva. It was warm and moist... (of course, finished up with) this is a TRUE story, pass it on.